Father’s Day week in Australia is a time to celebrate fathers, stepfathers, and other father figures who make a difference in children’s lives. It’s also a good reminder to reflect on the role dads play in shaping their children’s futures.
One area where dads often underestimate their influence is in sexual health education. When you think back, did your dad or a father figure ever talk to you about bodies, puberty, relationships, consent stereotypes or even pornography? For many people, the answer is no. Traditionally, this responsibility was handed to mothers.
Research is clear—fathers play a vital role in educating their children about sex and relationships, whether through the words they say, the attitudes they show, or the behaviours they model every single day.
When I asked my husband what he thought about being a sex educator, his answer was simple: “I don’t have to know everything. I just have to be willing to listen and have conversations.”
That humility is the key. Kids don’t need perfect answers; they need parents who are willing to show up, admit what they don’t know, and talk things through together (and sometimes laugh when you can).
It’s about everyday modelling. When we talk honestly our kids don’t just hear facts—we see how a grown man handles uncertainty, questions, getting things wrong, and even being honest about his own embarrassment, like the time my son asked my husband what a condom was at a shop counter (with a line of very interested people behind us, all waiting to hear how I would respond).
But it’s so much more than that and right now, in a world where gender-based violence, online misogyny, pornography and stereotypes that are often shaping how young people learn about sex, dads’ and father figures involvement is more important than ever. Kids need more than just information; they need living, breathing role models full of respect, kindness, and healthy connections.
Check out the blog that I wrote here about should fathers or mothers teach children about sex
A Dad's Perspective
As Father’s Day approaches, I sat down with my husband, a school principal and father of three, to ask why he thinks dads matter in sex education:
Here are 5 thoughts why Dads Play a Big Role in Sex Education Too
1. A different perspective can be incredibly powerful
Two heads are better than one, especially with tricky topics. My wife and I don't always agree, but that disagreement has helped our kids hear more than one way of thinking. Rowena has pushed me to rethink how we talk about topics like masturbation or boundaries, and that conversation often lands with them in a way mine wouldn't.
It's not about "two voices slam-dunking the truth"; it's about showing that people can wrestle with tough questions and still come to compassionate, practical advice, while aligning with your shared family values.
2. It's not just one talk, one place, one time
Conversations aren't one-size-fits-all. Start early with simple concepts like body autonomy and privacy; layer in puberty basics as they grow; and have more nuanced talks about relationships, contraception, and online life as teens approach.
The goal is gradual literacy that grows with them. Aim to have lots of short conversations, being open and available to answer questions as they arise—not just the one talk! And as you have these conversations, remember that you are surrounded by opportunities everywhere.
There's value in more than one safe space to talk. Sometimes your kids will talk to Dad first, sometimes not at all, and that's okay. A relaxed chat in the car, after dinner, or even a walk in Aisle 36 at Bunnings can be less intimidating than a sit-down at the kitchen table. The goal isn't to trap them into a talk but to keep doors open so curiosity can land somewhere that feels safe.
3. Times have changed, and kids need us more than ever — be a learner too
We've all seen how media, social media, and online content shape what kids think about sex, bodies, and relationships. The old "talk" isn't enough anymore (especially the one-and-only talk I had with my own dad that lasted a whole 2 minutes).
Kids are navigating a flood of information, and misinformation. They need a dad who shows up with curiosity, not judgment; facts and openness, rather than shame or fear. And the best thing I've learned as a parent of teens? Often the best moments come from shutting up and listening — staying open-minded, genuinely curious, and truly interested in their world.
I've learned so much about their friendships, moods, passions, disappointments, and crushes (including driving all over Sydney in the early hours so they could get a glimpse of Justin Bieber). I've learned what it's like having a period and how to approach conversations seeking to understand. The key: be a learner too, and let them teach you as you walk this path together.
4. The power of modelling — consent, boundaries, and respectful relationships
Times have changed, and kids need us more than ever. We've all seen how media, social media, and online content shape what kids think about sex, bodies, and relationships. The old "talk" isn't enough anymore (especially the one and only talk that I had with my own dad that lasted a whole 2 minutes).
Kids are navigating a flood of information, and misinformation. They need a dad who shows up with curiosity, not judgment; facts and openness, rather than shame or fear. Open, guilt-free conversations beat silence. If your kid asks a tough question, respond with calm honesty. If you don't know the answer, say so and say you'll figure it out together.
The tone matters as much as the content. The goal is to reduce shame and make learning feel like a team effort. Be honest and tell them if you're embarrassed. Be brave and talk about some of your experiences—especially some of the awkward details of what it was like for you when you were going through puberty.
Do your kids a favour and give them the opportunity to answer their questions, by showing them that you are present, interested, and okay with being vulnerable. Peers and media aren't the final word. Friends and online content can distort reality.
Help your kids distinguish between entertainment and real life. Talk about messages they're seeing, ask questions, and encourage critical thinking: What's being sold? Is it fair, respectful, and achievable? Don't you want to be your child's educator, rather than Google or a porn site, or your kid's best friend?
5. Showing up and being present is really what matters
The power of a dad just being present in a child's life cannot be overstated. Present and not distracted by work, emails, or whatever else is competing for your attention. Kids tune in and can tell when you're truly there versus when you're physically present but mentally elsewhere. You don't have to get things right—just show your belief in them and your genuine unconditional love. When you do this, you don't have to strive for perfection; your authentic self is all your kids want and need.
Remember that you're not alone, and you're definitely not expected to get it right all the time. Like any other discussion in life, the point isn't perfection; it's progress. Celebrate small wins—a question asked and an honest answer given, a boundary set, a calm response in the moment. And if you mess up, own it, apologise, and move on. Kids learn just as much (if not more) from our mistakes and apologies as from our solid moments.
Here’s a practical Father’s Day nudge. If you want to take a concrete step this Father’s Day, pick one thing below that you’ll actually do over the next week or two:
- Start a regular “check-in with dad or a mentor father figure” chats about feelings, friendships, and online life.
- Share a trusted resource (a book, a reputable website) and read or watch it together.
- Set a family agreement on media use, privacy, and online consent.
- Chat about who are 5 trusted adults who your child can turn to if they are scared or worried about something.
- Model a calm, respectful response when a tough question arises.
- Do an Amazing Me Puberty Course with your child. LINK HERE
Check out the blog here that I wrote about parental controls
So, to every dad who shows up with listening ears, who’s patient when a question sounds awkward, who’s honest about not knowing everything but willing to learn, you’re shaping your child’s understanding of sex, bodies, and relationships in powerful ways. Your openness teaches them to be curious, kind, and responsible adults. Your openness does NOT encourage them to be promiscuous, rather it keeps them safe.
Final Words
So, to every dad who shows up with listening ears, who’s patient when a question sounds awkward, who’s honest about not knowing everything but willing to learn, you’re shaping your child’s understanding of sex, bodies, and relationships in powerful ways. Your openness teaches them to be curious, kind, and responsible adults. Your openness does NOT encourage them to be promiscuous, rather it keeps them safe.
Cheers to you, dads. You matter more than you know.
Happy Father’s Day to all the dads (and father figures) who understand that sex education isn’t a one-time talk but a lifetime full of conversations. Your willingness to show up, listen, and lead with empathy makes a real difference in how your kids navigate their world—and how they treat others as they grow into young adults. All of this now lays the foundation for any healthy relationship later on and that includes “sexual relationships”
Helpful Resources
Boys & Sex
This is the companion to best-selling author Peggy Orenstein Girls & Sex. This book, 'Boys & Sex: Young Men on Hook-ups, Love, Porn, Consent, and Navigating New Masculinity', gives us this perspective.
Shameless Parenting
Shameless Parenting was written by Dr. Tina Schermer Sellers to help parents and carers who want to raise confident kids around the top of sexual health.
Body Safety Education
With a book like Body Safety Education, we can create a safer world for our kids by protecting them from sexual abuse.
My Body Belongs to Me - a Parent’s Guide
’My Body Belongs to Me’ a Parent’s Guide by Elizabeth Shroeder is for adults and parents about how to teach the whole family practically about consent and boundaries.
